Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Zombie '90: Extreme Pestilence (1991)

Like most of Schnaas' movies, most people who watch it hate it. That's a shame 'cause this is actually a pretty entertaining trash movie. So far I had only seen some of his more 'recent' work: Nikos (2003), Unrated: The Movie (2009) and Karl the Butcher vs. Axe (2010). I wasn't really impressed by any of those movies, but I'm really digging this earlier work.

A military machine carrying untested lethal chemicals crashes into a forest, a dead patient comes back to life in the operation room and mutilated bodies are being found all over the country. A new epidemic has broken out, the "Extreme Pestilence". Two doctors discover the epidemic and take on the hopeless fight against the living dead. The only way to kill the zombies is to destroy the brain or seperate the brain from the rest of the body. 

The dubbing is one of the most discussed subjects of Zombie '90.... It's absolutely brilliant! Main character 1 is one of most German-esque dudes I've ever seen, yet he has the voice of blacksploitation hero Shaft. Meanwhile main character 2 has the voice of the stereotypical gay guy. Together they form an amazing duo, especially when they start rambling hilariously weird one-liners. The dubbing absolutely makes this movie. While watching the movie you'll get the feeling that they didn't know what was in the original script, and they just thought of dialogue on the spot. Whether that's true or not, it does make for some very entertaining dialogue. Some might find it childish humor, but I like it.

The gore isn't amazing. Believe me, there's enough blood, guts and limbs to keep it entertaining, but the splatter itself isn't of any remarkable quality. A nice addition is that the zombies use knifes, sledgehammers, machetes and chainsaws to kill and mutilate their victims. This creates a nice variety of deaths.

Quality wise it shouldn't come as a surprise that this movie fucking blows. The editing is atrocious. Numerous times scenes are abruptly cut. Also, one of the main characters has a way too obvious double roll as a zombie. Looks like they couldn't even scramble together enough extras. As far as camerawork goes, there's one nice shot, which is an homage to Zombi 2 (the zombie hand touching the glass while looking through the window in POV). Also notice how during a fight between a random guy and a female zombie, the cameraman has more interest in the female's ass than in the actual fight, causing the camera to awkwardly zoom in and focus on the ass multiple times. Quality wise the best thing about this movie is probably the soundtrack. It was apparently done by a guy named Gregg Parker (this is his only credited movie), who created a piece of music that could have easily been used in one of those 80's Italian zombie movies. Near the end of the movie you can see that Schnaas is really struggling to reach 70 minutes of film, causing some drawn out scenes.

Anyway, Zombie '90 is one hell of a freaking ride. The dubbing and countless scenes of (fake) violence make this one entertaining as hell. I have no idea if this was ever released in German, but I imagine it would be a whole lot less fun. The American dubbing made me laugh my ass off numerous times. I'm not claiming this is a good movie. But it made me enjoy my evening, so why should I bash it....?




Saturday, July 18, 2015

Non-Horror Explotation: Conquest (1983)

Unexpectedly Conquest turned out to be another fantastic Fulci movie. I have not seen much of his work outside the horror genre (apart from the great western Massacre Time and the poor sci-fi movie Warriors of the Year 2072), but Fulci definitely proves he's capable of making good movies outside the genre.

Two warriors are determined to kill of evil goddes Ocron. They have to fight their way through many grotesque monsters though.

You guessed it, the plotline is pretty thin. The two warriors are beefcake Mace (played by Mexican Jorge Rivero) and Ilias (played by Andrea Occhipinti, ''known'' for his roles in The New York Ripper and A Blade in the Dark). Our evil goddes Ocron is played magically by Sabrina Siani, who walks around topless and with a creepy golden mask for the entire movie. It's safe to say that the plot isn't the movie's strongest point. The brilliant atmosphere however is.

Conquest feels very surreal and lugubrious. The monster and costume designs are perfect. The pace is unlike any other movie. Scenes where there's no fighting for more then 3 minutes are pretty much nonexistent. It also helps that Fulci included some nice pieces of gore during these fightscenes. It's definitely not a horror movie, but there is gore in galore. The score, done by master Claudio Simonetti, is absolutely brilliant as well, although not known to many. It definitely adds a little extra to the movie.

Unfortunately I'm not as happy with the visual side of the film. The over the top usage of smoke machines might be a little cheesy, but still looks great. It gives the movie a very desolate feeling. Unfortunately the ligting of the movie sometimes lacks, not to mention the strange haze that seems to lay over the screen. Therefor it's sometimes a little hard to see what's going on.

Conquest is definitely another great one by Fulci. It's totally different from movies like Zombi 2 and The Beyond (films which I so far consider to be his best work), but definitely deserves to be named among them. A magnificent atmosphere, great gore and a furious naked goddes. You've got me!





Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Non-Horror Exploitation: Sadomania - Hölle der Lust (A.K.A. Hellhole Women) (1981)

This is the first movie I've seen of Euro-trash legend Jesús Franco, who (in his better days) released about 7 movies a year. I'm not too familiar with his work yet but I do believe I heard somewhere that it was not uncommon for him to shoot 2 or 3 movies at the same time with the same cast, crew, equipment and locations.

The captives in a women's prison have to suffer daily punishment from their evil (transsexual) warden ''Magda Hurtado''. 

Yup, that's about the only plot you'll get. I think I expected a more brutal women in prison movie. It's actually quite tame. It's also nowhere near a horror movie. There is however an insane amount of nudity. Both guards and captives walk around in hotpants and bare breasts. After 38 minutes there is a scene where no nudity is shown for about 30 to 40 seconds. This record is not broken throughout the movie. Every now and then the close-ups are so detailed I really wondered what's the line between soft and hardcore. Certain stills of the warden could have easily been printed in a biology book: Chapter ''female genitalia''. What's also noticeable is the fact that every single character in this movie is so horny they are basically willing to have sex with anyone. They don't care whether that person has just tried to kill them or whether the person is dying. THEY MUST HAVE SEX!

For someone who is known to have produced so much trash in his career I was quite surprised by the great camerawork in this one. Franco and his cameracrew certainly know how to create some beautiful looking pictures. The setting, somewhere near the south of Spain, is absolutely stunning as well. But as great as the camerawork is, the choreography of fight scenes is absolutely terrible. Due to the clumsy way they are done, the little bit of action we are shown looks utterly ridiculous. The same goes for the scene with a plastic crocodile, which could have been a legendary scene but in stead is fucked up by ignorant filmmaking.

Even though the movie's running time is fairly long (about 103 minutes) it never gets boring (I wonder why.....). Near the end we get an amazing cameo of Jesús Franco himself as a gay brothel owner. Also the ending (SPOILER), in which the evil warden is forced to walk into the swamp where crocodiles are waiting to chew her to pieces, looks absolutely brilliant. 

Not a terrible movie to begin my Jesús Franco journey with it seems. He might go a little too overboard in terms of nudity, but since the original script couldn't have been more than five pages I don't blame him. Sadomania is an entertaining movie that could have used a bit more action and violence though.

Fun Fact (Source: IMDB)
In the scene where Lucas is seen having sex with a young man, the role of the young man is actually played by lead actress Ajita Wilson, minus her wig and wearing a fake mustache.


Sunday, July 12, 2015

Non-Horror Exploitation: Terminator II (A.K.A. Shocking Dark) (1990)

You might think that James Cameron's Terminator 2: Judgement Day is the only Terminator 2 out there. That's incorect. In 1990 (although filmed in 1988/89) Bruno Mattei directed an unofficial sequel which shamelessly was called Terminator 2. It's really incredible how they even got away with it (even though the movie was never released as Terminator 2 in the USA).

In a polluted future Venice researchers work to improve the situation. One day, unknown forces start killing them. A team of soldiers and a couple of civilians is sent to investigate. Soon, they encounter strange murderous creatures. 

Terminator 2 can be described as a compilation of everything that was ''cool'' around that period. Some influences from Aliens (1986), some influences from Predator (1987) and of course a lot of influences from The Terminator (1984). Writer Claudio Fragasso took everything he liked from those movies and created one himself. It should not come as a surprise that Fragasso was involved in this project. He has been involved in numerous unofficial ''sequels''. His most famous one obviously being Troll 2 (1990), the unofficial sequel to Troll (1986). He also directed The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3. No, not Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 which you might be familiar with and which was directed by Jeff Burr. Fragasso directed a movie called Non Aprite Quella Porta 3 (1990). In Italy Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies where released under the title Non Aprite Quella Porta, causing Fragasso to fool the Italian audience in thinking it was an official third part of the franchise. Obviously Bruno Mattei didn't shy away from ''borrowing'' stuff for his movies either. Take for example the Goblin soundtrack he apparently used without permission for his movie Virus (1980).

Back to the movie, which turned out to be quite mediocre. The acting, even for a movie of these standards, is absolutely terrible. The worst one was without a doubt Haven Tyler (not surprisingly this is her only acting credit). What's even more painfull is that Tyler has the lead role and is supposed to be some kind of Sigourney Weaver type of character. Needless to say the cast is very weak. Usually you'll see some familiar faces turn up in B-movies like these. Not in this one though. Most of the cast are one-time-actors. Geretta Geretta is about the only exception with roles in Demons (1985) and Rats: Night of Terror (1984).

The monsters in the movie are pretty much never really shown on screen properly. Not to mention the few times you do get to see them the monster design is pretty weak. The pace of the movie is decent but because the action is so predictable and uninteresting it still feels quite boring. The atmosphere is pretty good though. A lot of that has to do with the cool setting in the dark underground tunnels. The crew even plays around with some interesting lighting choises. The soundtrack is pretty decent as well, although not memorable. The movie goes pretty over the top in the last 15 minutes with a bit of timetraveling, the Terminator chasing two ladies in Venice and the eventual ending where the Terminator guy is killed (or sent back in time???) by some kind of electrical device.. Pretty vague...

Even though the poster is pretty god damn amazing, the movie itself is pretty tasteless. The monsters look poor, the gore is non-existent and the action is mostly lame. The atmosphere is good though and the setting is pretty awesome as well. It's not as cool as the poster makes it look like it is though.



Friday, July 10, 2015

The Sleeper (2012)

After Death Stop Holocaust (2009), The Sleeper turned out to be another Justin Russell movie to absolutely adore. It's sickeningly underrated at IMDB with a 4,0 and deserves much more praise than what it's getting.

It's 1981 and the girls of Alpha Gamma Theta sorority are having a party. As the new pledges arrive, so does an uninvited guest. Little do the sisters know someone is watching them in the shadows. As the girls shower, study, eat and sleep the stalker studies the girls. One by one he finds the girls at their most vulnerable and murders them. The police hunt for the missing girls and their killer, but will they find them in time? Or will the girls be forced to fight for their lives...

Russell chooses to set the film in the 80's this time, which creates a fun atmosphere. The old phones etc. are all vintage as hell, but the most 80's-esque scene is the disco scene, which seemed completely out-of-place and therefore is absolutely brilliant. It won't be a surprise for you that Russell also goes back to the 80's, the golden era of slasher movies, in terms of movie type. There is a dark killer out there who's slicing and dicing his way through various hot girls. Cliché's aren't backed away from, but if you do it in such a cool way as Russell does I don't care how many cliché's you put in your movie. The gore isn't next level or anything like that but still does the job. The kills are definitely fun to watch and the effects are cheesy (in the good way of course). The buil-up to kills is pretty well done as well. I love when a director manages to squeeze in that half a second shot of the shining blade of a knife before it strikes its victim.

The atmosphere in The Sleeper is simply amazing. Visually it's mostly great (especially for a movie with a small budget of 30,000 dollars). Don't expect Argento kind of shots but the movie does breathe that typical 80's slasher vibe. The acting is pretty decent, apart from 1 or 2 actors. Russell even manages to get 1 or 2 girls to go nude in front of the camera, and lets be honest: what's a slasher movie without a set of tits or two...?

Unfortunately the movie does have a few flaws (then again, what would you expect from a movie of this budget range?). Take the soundtrack for example. It's a great piece of work, supposedly done by a band called Gremlin (Goblin ode, anyone??). The thing is that the music is used in scenes that don't need that music. Simple visits to a bar for example are supported by scary, spooky music. Another thing is that the music seems to be a tad too loud, making it hard sometimes to hear the dialogue.

Overall The Sleeper is another magnificent horror movie from Justin Russell. Lets hope his next project (The Sleeper 2??!) isn't too far away. Cool gore, cool killer and an awesome 80's vibe. It's classic fun, like these types of movies are supposed to be.





Monday, July 6, 2015

Non-Horror Exploitation: Gojira tai Mekagojira (A.K.A. Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla) (1974)

Old monster movies with minature buildings and guys in ugly costumes: they never manage to amaze me, if done correctly and entertainingly of course. A perfect example is Robot Monster (1953) - a disastrous example is Ape (1976). Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla lays somewhere in between. It's not terrible, but it's not great either.

Aliens intend to take over the planet and, just in case Godzilla tries to interfere, have built a mechanical version of him to put an end to his interference. The Earth humans summon the legendary King Seesar to assist Godzilla in the battle. 

I got tired of the Japanese and their superstitiousness fairly quickly. Luckily they did turn out to be right and Godzilla appears from out of nowhere (along with a bunch of other monsters). Unfortunately Mechagodzilla and especially Godzilla are extra's for most of the movie. In stead we mainly follow a group (that seems to grow bigger and bigger every second) of Japs trying to find out why Godzilla has risen. This causes the middle of the movie to be quite boring. I don't give a fuck why Godzilla has risen, I just want him and the other monsters to create havoc. Unfortunately director Jun Fukuda didn't agree with me and spends endless scenes trying to figure out who is behind the Mechagodzilla and why the other monsters have risen. As icing on the cake there's also a bunch of aliens (including shiny space suits) involved. Strangely enough these aliens also seem to have some kind of camelon-esque power causing them to look like any other Asian. When they die though, they turn into a strange man-like version of King Kong, which caused me to smile every now and then.

The last 20 minutes are used for the ''main battle'' between Mechagodzilla, Godzilla and King Ceesar (who moves way to smooth for a giant monster). The fights do look fairly cool. The highlight of the fighting is seen much earlier in the movie though, in a scene where Godzilla and Mechagodzilla go head-to-head in an oil refinery and destroy the whole place. This causes some great explosions and an overall great looking scene. The splatter-like scenes where Godzilla is shot to a bloody pulp is worth mentioning as well.

Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla turned out to be a mediocre monster movie. It could have definitely been awesome if it weren't for the mostly boring scenes. The fightingscenes between the gigantic monster do look cool, but please, we want more of 'em in a movie like this. Unfortunately the movie is mostly filled with uninteresting characters, an overacting grandpa and Asian space dudes in shiny gear.


Fun Facts (Source:IMDB)
In the German release of the movie, MechaGodzilla is called King Kong. The reason for this name-change is unknown, although it is likely that the German distributors simply wanted to ride on the actual King Kong's popularity. It is also possible that they have been inspired by the ape-like aliens who control the robot in the movie. 

This was the first Godzilla film, in its original Japanese version, to finally give onscreen credit to the suitmation actors with the names of the respective monsters they played. (Up to that point, suitmation actors did receive onscreen credit, but just as regular cast members.) All Toho-produced Godzilla films have since maintained this practice. 


Friday, July 3, 2015

Non-Horror Exploitation: I Cinque del Condor (A.K.A. Wild Team) (1985)

Yeah I know, the title on the still on the left is completely different from the original title I used for this review. Apparently Squadra Selvaggia is an alternative Italian title for I Cinque del Condor though, so we're fine. Lets just call it Wild Team to not get confused anymore. Wild Team is just one of those dozens and dozens of B action movies the Italian released in the 80's. It turned out to be a quite decent one as well.

A South American rebel leader in exile in Miami is given one last chance to overthrow his successor, a brutal dictator, by a multi-national mining group out to exploit his countries' mineral resources. PROBLEM: The leader's only son is held hostage by the dictator, and will be executed at the first sign of attack. SOLUTION: Recruit a team of deadly fighters, all experts in guerilla warfare, to free the boy and eliminate the resistance. Thus, the Thunder Squad is born. The Thunder Sqaud is an all action, all fighting, all thrilling adventure into the country of a madman!

The story certainly isn't the most original one out there, but director Umberto Lenzi (Cannibal Ferox, Eaten Alive!) understands that and also understands how to still keep it interesting: By sticking to the name of the genre and show as much action as possible... The tagline of the Dutch VHS basically translates to ''They blow everyone to hell!'', and that about sums it up. The action certainly isn't next level or anything, but it's fun and entertaining stuff nonetheless.

The cast is pretty decent. We've got Antonio Sabato, Ivan Rassimov, Julia Kent and a bad-ass looking Salvatore Borghese (on action still to the right) as a veteran mercenary. The kid that needs to be rescued is annoying, which seems to be a standard in movies (wether they're low-budget or blockbusters).

Pretty standard action movie from Lenzi, but done very well. No boring dialogues but just a shitload of action scenes and a good pace. The goodguys never miss and the badguys like to through enemey fire without any form of protection. But since it makes for a high bodycount I could care less about logics. And fortunately so did Lenzi.




Monday, June 22, 2015

Begotten (1990)

I had had my eyes on this one for a while now and this time I finally decided to watch it. Begotten is a typical love it or hate it movie. Some people praise it to be a masterpiece, others think it's a pile of shit. In this case I belong to the second group, although I don't think it's a TOTAL piece of shit.

God disembowels himself with a straight razor. The spirit-like Mother Earth emerges, venturing into a bleak, barren landscape. Twitching and cowering, the Son Of Earth is set upon by faceless cannibals.

Director E. Elias Merhige creates a strange type of movie, which I can only describe as a morbid mix between The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, Cannibal Holocaust and The Passion of the Christ, with an 1800 screenfilter. On a couple of occasions you'll really wonder what the heck you're watching (did I really just see the lifeless body of god get a handjob by some strange chick!..?). The plot will be suggestive for 99% of the viewers who watch this movie without further ''knowledge'', meaning reading a plot on IMDB prior to watching it. The movie itself doesn't make clear at all what's happening. I guess it's just the viewer's job to figure that out himself.

Merhige chooses not to use any kind of dialogue or music. That's fine, but it also means that the other soundeffects to create the atmosphere have to be top notch. Unfortunately they aren't. It's mainly just singing birds that are heard in the background. A total shame because the ''gasping sound'' this strange, spastic creature occasionaly makes is creepy as hell. The movie is mainly praised for its lugubrious vibe. I'll admit that there are some scenes that are pretty weird and morbid, but most aren't. In fact, most scenes are terrible boring. The camerawork has a huge influence on this. When there's good use of the camera (like in the scene where the spastic creature gets hit in the head with the hammer), the scene tends to be very creepy. Unfortunately though most of this movie's camerawork is unclear. 9 out of 10 times you won't have a single clue what's going on on the screen. I had hoped that Begotten would be a total assault on your senses. Unfortunately it's only an extreme test for your patience, which isn't one of my stronger characteristics anyway. 


Normally I'd encourage the making and existance of projects like these, but they should have just made this a 15 minute short. A full length film, even though it's only 70 minutes, is just overkill. Definitely a disappointing piece of film, which is also burdened by some terrible pace by the way (mainly talking about the scenes where they hoist the spastic creature up the hill or the vaginal mutilation scene...snoozzzzee)

Fun Fact (Source: IMDB)
Approximately eight to ten hours of optical work - re-photographing, visual treatments, and filtering - was required to produce one minute of film. The total post-production period for the 72-minute movie was eight months.


Friday, June 19, 2015

Quando Alice Ruppe lo Specchio (A.K.A. Touch of Death) (1988)

I wouldn't call this one of Fulci's last attempts but around this time he was certainly nearing the end of his career. This translates into the quality of the movie. It's by no means a brilliant atmospheric masterpiece like The Beyond or Zombi 2 were, but it's still a very enjoyable one for Fulci fans. Only now did I notice how many stock footage of this movie Fulci used to make ''A Cat in the Brain''. Actors who had never been on set of that movie have lead roles in it. Not the only time that happened in Italy though. Fred Williamson for example never knew about the existence of Black Cobra 4. When he found out years later that the movie existed it turned out that footage from the first three movies were used to make a fourth one (obviously without Williamson getting a penny for it).

Lester Parson is a middle aged guy who dates women, only to kill them and take their valuables. He gets spooked though when a copycat seems to be interested in his work.

Brett Halsey plays the role of a murdering, and cannibalistic, maniac with a lot of gamble debts. He does a fairly decent job as well. The gore is a la Fulci again, brutal as hell. The scene where Parson smashes a broad in the face with a stick only to cook her head in an oven is absolute gold! Fulci-favorite Fabio Frizzi unfortunately was not involved with creating the music this time, which leads to a forgettable soundtrack. Even the atmosphere and camerawork have been better in many other Fulci movies. He doesn't even make use of his infamous ''zoom-in'' shots. Every now and then the movie turns painfully slapstick (including supposedly ''funny'' situations with the corpses Parson is trying to dispose).

The cast has got some familiar faces in it. Zora Kerova (Cannibal Ferox), even with hare-lip, easily is the most attractive of the bunch. She doesn't have much competition though. The other two ''female'' characters consist of a terribly annoying opera singer and a broad with a disgusting beard. Certainly some ''eye-candy'' wouldn't have hurt this movie. Another familiar face is Al Cliver, although his role is fairly small and not that memorable. The ending is very abrupt but not bad.

This certainly isn't one of Fulci's masterpieces, but that was to be expected. I still feel it's a little underrated though. It's certainly a better movie than Fulci's lazy ''A Cat in the Brain'', which strangely enough gets a higher rating on IMDB. While not a good movie, this one is still very entertaining. Not to mention the gore, which is mainly spectacular like usual. A Fulci fan should definitely NOT skip this one.





Scream... and Die! (1973)

First of all: nice Last House on the Left-kinda poster. Apart from that, this movie is a terrible English attempt to make a giallo. This movie can't have been watchable in the 70's and certainly isn't in 2015. Any form of pace is almost non-existent. After about 50 minutes you suddenly realise that you've mostly been watching main actress Andrea Allan, slowly strolling through her apartment. Believe me when I say I'm certainly not a fan of modern editing techniques with fast cuts etc. But this was just completely ridiculous.

A young model and her petty thief boyfriend find their way through the English fog to a backwoods manor in hopes of looting it. What they find instead is murder, and when the model attempts to find the house again, her efforts come to naught. 

The story itself is pretty ridiculous and the movie lacks any form of scarry build-up to deathscenes. The few deathscenes that this movie contains are poorly filmed and seem rushed. Instead director Jose Ramon Larraz focusses on useless scenes, stupid dialogue and boring characters. To keep things a little bit spicy he adds some naked female bodies. Every female actress that appears in this movie, including the beautiful Andrea Allan, gets fully naked at least once. Nice... But the director should know that a few tits here and there aren't going to change our hunger for horror scenes.

The dubbing is overly poor as well. The dialogue heard doesn't match with the movement of the actors' mouths, which is strange considering all actors spoke English on set. Not to mention that some dialogue isn't even dubbed, causing the viewer to see the actors' mouth move without hearing a single word of dialogue.

Wow, Scream and Die (A.K.A. The House That Vanished) turned out to be a disaster of a movie. I happen to find José Ramón Larraz an interesting director (I still want to see Edge of the Axe and Rest in Pieces), but with this movie he completely fails to entertain the viewer. The story sucks and the slow paced execution is even worse. The only good thing remaining is some female beauty, but that's about it.




Thursday, June 18, 2015

Just Before Dawn (1981)

Just Before Dawn never really had the big spotlights on himself due to the release of Friday the 13th and The Burning in and around the same time. That's a shame, because quality wise it certainly deserves just as much praise as the former two. On the other hand it's understandable. Just Before Dawn doesn't have the iconic ''Cropsy'' or the brilliant gore by Tom Savini. It's a modest but great slasher movie.

Five campers arrive in the mountains to examine some property they have bought, but are warned by the forest ranger Roy McLean that a huge machete-wielding maniac has been terrorising the area. Ignoring the warnings, they set up camp, and start disappearing one by one.

Just Before Dawn certainly takes its time in the build up. It's not a big deal though as the characters aren't overly annoying, the setting is beautiful and the camerawork is very effective, creating a certain tension even though not much is happening. The atmosphere is great and even though there isn't much going on, you still continually get the strange feeling of ''being watchted by the unknown''. 

After about 45 minutes the two retard hicks (brilliant killers btw) continue their killingspree. It has been said before that the gore in this one isn't anything special. The build up to those kills are once again great though. It's a little unfortunate that the movie just lasts about 10 minutes too long. Sadly somewhere around the ending of the movie I got a bit bored. 


Just Before Dawn is definitely one of the better 80's slashers around. Unfortunately it was never really able to step out of the shadows of its big brothers like Friday the 13th and The Burning. It has got some great tension and frights, a good atmosphere and a brilliant setting. Enjoy the ride.


Fun Facts: (Source: IMDB)
Director Jeff Lieberman said that countless strangers showed up at the filming location on the day that the scene of Jamie Rose swimming topless was to be filmed. Lieberman said that word of this shoot had apparently gotten out among the local forest rangers.

According to director Jeff Lieberman, despite numerous reviewers who have stated that the film was inspired by The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) or The Hills Have Eyes (1977), he had not seen either film when he began shooting this film.  

Chris Lemmon was performing a truly dangerous stunt when he was shot clinging to ropes after his fall into the rushing river. Lemmon had to physically hang on to the ropes for some time as the powerful river pulled at him. Only a matter of feet away him was the top of a huge waterfall that was notorious for people falling to their deaths from it.


Sunday, June 14, 2015

The Galaxy Invader (1985)

I've seen me some bad movies in my life, and this was definitely one of them. Another terribly 80 long minutes of my life.

An alien spaceship lands in a swamp area in rural USA. The locals quickly find out they can make a lot of money with capturing the alien and set out to hunt it down.

The ''alien'' is a dude in a cheap costume. I've got no problems with that. It adds to the cheesiness of movies like these. Unfortuntely director Don Dohler makes very little use of the alien. The story mainly centeres around a bunch of terribly acting local rednecks, with no charisma (apart from Richard Ruxton) whatsoever. And when a movie centers around a bunch of dusty, boring rednecks, the viewer tends to get bored...

The complete story must have been a result of a 5-minute brainstorm session of writers Don Dohler, Anne Frith and David Donoho. A plot is almost nonexistent. The fightscenes were even worse choreographed than the ones in my 5-minute, no budget, schoolproject. It's all so completely lame. The best example is right at the end of the movie, where someone slaps a person from a cliff (including a shot of a terrible looking mannequin). If you've seen this movie, you'll know what I'm talking about.



95% of the viewers would advice you to stay away from this movie, and so will I. Dohler could have learned a lot from movies like Phil Tucker's Robot Monster (1953), which manages to be one of the most entertaining movies ever without having a budget, a good story or a good monster costume. I'd only recommend watching The Galaxy Invader to either masochists or people who want to see every B-Monster Movie in the world. Althought those two things seem to be awfully close to each other.





Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Hatchet III (2013)

After Adam Green's excellent first two movies, BJ McDonnell, who had been a cameraman for the first two movies, was appointed to direct and finish the trilogy. And as was the case with the first two movies, it's another 80 minutes of pure entertainment.

A search and recovery team heads into the haunted swamp to pick up the pieces and Marybeth learns the secret to ending the voodoo curse that has left Victor Crowley haunting and terrorizing Honey Island Swamp for decades. 

First of all I should give compliments to the cast, which is filled with people who are perfect for these movies and who perform with a lot of joy. Zach Galligan, Caroline Williams, Parry Shen, Robert Diago DoQui, Derek Mears, Cody Blue Snider, Releah Vanderbilt, Sean Whalen, Jason Trost and Sid Haig as the racist redneck. Rarely do you see a movie with such a huge list of actors creating a huge amount of entertaining characters. On the other hand there's an unfortunate role by scream queen Danielle Harris, whose character seems a little bit too ''forced''... It's basically a lot of ''fuck you's'' and angry faces and not much more (although this clearly is more of a script issue). 

As expected, Hatchet III delivers tons of real gore (none of that CGI shit)... It's brutal, over the top and not to be taken too seriously... Just the way it should be in a splatter movie like this one. Apart from that Hatchet III is also the funniest movie of the three. We're bombarded with funny characters and one-liners (I laughed out loud multiple times), without it being too forced. 

 Hatchet III is a brilliant ending to the trilogy and is also the best of the three movies. Every now and then it's as predictable and cliche as can be (guy turns around with happy face - I killed him! - Victor Crowley slowly gets up in the background and brutallly kills the happy guy), but who the fuck cares...!? Overall Hatchet III will make splatter fans the happiest people in the world for 80 minutes.


Fun Facts (Source: IMDB)

Series creator Adam Green prides the Hatchet films on their "no CGI rule". All make-up effects are done the "old school" way with prosthetics, make-up, latex, and silicone in order to give the films their throw back feeling and tone. CGI and digital enhancement is only used for such things as wire removal or fixing any camera issues that occurred while filming, but never to create the films' outrageous special effects. This movie was no exception to this rule and Green continually challenged the make-up effects crew by writing crazy death scenes and sequences that most any other modern production would have brought in computer generated visual effects teams to accomplish. 

Actor Parry Shen has appeared in all three Hatchet films but as different characters. In Hatchet (2006), he played Shawn, who worked for the Swamp Tours. In Hatchet II (2010), he played Justin, who was Shawn's brother. Justin also worked for the Swamp Tours. In this third film, he played a paramedic named Andrew. Andrew is not related to Shawn or Justin. A joke is even made in the film about how one of the bodies they find looks like him.  

Actor Cody Blue Snider (who plays "Deputy Schneiderman") started out as Adam Green's personal assistant during the making of Frozen (2010) and then worked as a production assistant on Hatchet II (2010) before Green wrote the role in this film specifically for him to perform.